The other day we went to viola/violin lessons. Since Luke was out of school he got to come with us. Eleanor and Amanda each have a 45 minute lesson, I have a half-hour lesson, so that means Luke gets to wait for 2 hours while his sisters have lessons. Ah, the joy of being the 3rd child.
In addition, after the first lesson of each month, we get a "treat" at the local coffee shop. They sell bubble teas, as well as lots of other bakery treats. Luke had had a treat after his piano lesson the week before, so just the girls needed a treat that week.
As you might guess, Luke asked for a treat while his sisters were getting a treat. I pointed out that he had already had a treat and that it wouldn't be fair for him to have another, but I didn't say it was out of the question. In my mind, I was thinking that he had behaved very nicely during the lesson and he was pretty hungry since it was close to lunch. I was almost ready to say that he could have something small when he started bugging me incessantly about how he needed a treat.
It was an interesting situation: I had been ready to be merciful and give him a reward---but as soon as it became about him asking me over and over and over (after repeated requests for him to just stop talking about it) I really couldn't give him anything. At first I thought that maybe it was about me needing to feel merciful, but I think that what is going on is that when he keeps insisting that he is right and that he have his way, we cannot give in even if we had originally wanted to. It's hard for him to let something go, but it's a lesson he needs to learn. Probably it's my fault for giving in to him too much as a younger child...
I told him all this so that hopefully he learns not to bug people. Maybe we will both learn something.
In addition, after the first lesson of each month, we get a "treat" at the local coffee shop. They sell bubble teas, as well as lots of other bakery treats. Luke had had a treat after his piano lesson the week before, so just the girls needed a treat that week.
As you might guess, Luke asked for a treat while his sisters were getting a treat. I pointed out that he had already had a treat and that it wouldn't be fair for him to have another, but I didn't say it was out of the question. In my mind, I was thinking that he had behaved very nicely during the lesson and he was pretty hungry since it was close to lunch. I was almost ready to say that he could have something small when he started bugging me incessantly about how he needed a treat.
It was an interesting situation: I had been ready to be merciful and give him a reward---but as soon as it became about him asking me over and over and over (after repeated requests for him to just stop talking about it) I really couldn't give him anything. At first I thought that maybe it was about me needing to feel merciful, but I think that what is going on is that when he keeps insisting that he is right and that he have his way, we cannot give in even if we had originally wanted to. It's hard for him to let something go, but it's a lesson he needs to learn. Probably it's my fault for giving in to him too much as a younger child...
I told him all this so that hopefully he learns not to bug people. Maybe we will both learn something.
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