This past week Michael has been at a conference. It actually doesn't matter much that the conference is being held in our town: he leaves early in the morning and gets back well after the kids are asleep (after I should be asleep, actually).
Since he is away, I've been taking care of the children by myself. This makes for a long day. Some of the length is from the feeling that really, no one (aside from the kids) cares what I'm doing (and they often think I would do a better job with more ice cream and fewer rules). There is no one to tell my troubles to, no one cares if I managed to get the kids all to bed on time and happy, no one (adult) will laugh at Luke's antics and see how he is growing... I know objectively that there are many people who care about the kids (most of whom read this blog) but it feels very lonely and unrewarding, with only my self knowledge that I have done a good job to keep me going.
At any rate, today we had a triumph. After church we often go out to eat (otherwise we get home at 1 and haven't eaten yet, which really messes up our schedule). Because Michael was at the conference, we went out to Red Robin. After a bit of trouble arriving there (Luke had fallen asleep in the car), we got balloons for all the kids (including Luke) and sat down.
Then we had a wonderful meal. Eleanor and Amanda colored and read and played with their balloons patiently. Luke didn't let go of his balloon all during lunch, actually. They were not too loud, they were cheerful, they had (somewhat) interesting things to say... and then we got our food and they ate! Amanda ate her regular meal of a hamburger patty (no toppings, no meat) along with some french fries and some mandarin oranges. Eleanor ate most of her macaroni and cheese, all of her cantaloupe, and all her shake (a reward for sharing her macaroni with Luke). Luke ate peaches, hamburger (from Amanda), macaroni and cheese (from Eleanor) and fries (from me) in larger quantities than usual. I even got enough to eat (guacamole, mmm).
One note about Luke: he found his fork today. Always before he has been interested in a fork as a musical instrument and as a potential tool for poking himself and others. Today he discovered that he could use the fork to move food from his dish to his mouth. On the one hand it made things more difficult for me, since he really can't spear the food by himself, so I put things on the end of the fork and then help him get them all the way to his mouth (without flinging macaroni at the neighboring tables). On the other hand, the whole process was so interesting that he only spent half the time trying to stand up in his high chair that he usually does and he actually chowed down. It wasn't neat, but you have to start somewhere...
Since he is away, I've been taking care of the children by myself. This makes for a long day. Some of the length is from the feeling that really, no one (aside from the kids) cares what I'm doing (and they often think I would do a better job with more ice cream and fewer rules). There is no one to tell my troubles to, no one cares if I managed to get the kids all to bed on time and happy, no one (adult) will laugh at Luke's antics and see how he is growing... I know objectively that there are many people who care about the kids (most of whom read this blog) but it feels very lonely and unrewarding, with only my self knowledge that I have done a good job to keep me going.
At any rate, today we had a triumph. After church we often go out to eat (otherwise we get home at 1 and haven't eaten yet, which really messes up our schedule). Because Michael was at the conference, we went out to Red Robin. After a bit of trouble arriving there (Luke had fallen asleep in the car), we got balloons for all the kids (including Luke) and sat down.
Then we had a wonderful meal. Eleanor and Amanda colored and read and played with their balloons patiently. Luke didn't let go of his balloon all during lunch, actually. They were not too loud, they were cheerful, they had (somewhat) interesting things to say... and then we got our food and they ate! Amanda ate her regular meal of a hamburger patty (no toppings, no meat) along with some french fries and some mandarin oranges. Eleanor ate most of her macaroni and cheese, all of her cantaloupe, and all her shake (a reward for sharing her macaroni with Luke). Luke ate peaches, hamburger (from Amanda), macaroni and cheese (from Eleanor) and fries (from me) in larger quantities than usual. I even got enough to eat (guacamole, mmm).
One note about Luke: he found his fork today. Always before he has been interested in a fork as a musical instrument and as a potential tool for poking himself and others. Today he discovered that he could use the fork to move food from his dish to his mouth. On the one hand it made things more difficult for me, since he really can't spear the food by himself, so I put things on the end of the fork and then help him get them all the way to his mouth (without flinging macaroni at the neighboring tables). On the other hand, the whole process was so interesting that he only spent half the time trying to stand up in his high chair that he usually does and he actually chowed down. It wasn't neat, but you have to start somewhere...
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One thing I like to do is to tell parents of well behaved children that I appreciate it, and I know the work that went into getting the children to act like civilized people. A bit of appreciation can go a long way on some days.