Skip to main content

What I learned this mother's day

When I was little, I would make projects in school for my mother. I always assumed that she loved them, she never gave me any reason to think that she didn't.

As I grew up a little, I looked objectively at the things I gave her and decided on my own that she really didn't love them, she loved me and was too nice to tell me that they were not worth keeping. I mean, who needs all those bookmarks and pots anyway. I stopped (mostly) giving her handmade things for mother's day, unless I thought they were really objectively worth keeping.

This year Eleanor made me a necklace with a heart on it. "It's symmetrical!" she told me, and pointed out how she had made the beads the same on each side. Every time I would talk to her about school, she would mention that they were making a surprise, but that I shouldn't ask any more about it. When she brought home the present in her bag she uncharacteristically brought her bag right up to her room and hid it in her closet. Amanda made me a bookmark with a pressed flower on it, and she wrote her "own letter" on it. Michael had to remind her about it on Sunday, but she watched eagerly as I opened it and was proud to have made it.

I love the gifts wholeheartedly, even though they are not objectively useful. It's not that I love them because they are the best that the girls can do, or because I don't want to hurt their feelings. These gifts came from the heart, and I see that every time I look at them.

I finally realize that when my mother told me how much she loved what I did for her, or when she told me that all she really wanted was a homemade card from me, she was telling the absolute truth. And now I can do the same for my girls.

Thanks, Mom.
Labels:

Comments

Anonymous said…
Ahh...thank YOU, sweetie. I'm sorry that as you got older you concluded that what you made wasn't valuable to me. It always has been/will be. Love you lots.
Mom
June 4, 2008 at 2:43 PM
mathmom said…
Well, when we get older we often think we get wiser... until we get wiser still. I am excited to learn the next thing.
June 4, 2008 at 9:14 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

My hero, Helen Parr

Otherwise known as Elastigirl , a.k.a Mrs. Incredible. She is a stay at home mom ( SAHM ), she clearly feels that what she is doing is important and is willing to give up a lot to do it (remember her comment in the intro: "I'm at the top of my game! Leave saving the world to the guys? I don't think so.") But she is finding fulfillment in leading her family from day to day, in doing a hard job well. She also knows that she is very talented, and that knowledge helps her see beyond the repetitive drudgery of staying home. My favorite scene is from the deleted introduction, where she talks with a "career woman" who is of the opinion that staying home is fine for people who can't do anything else. She responds that taking care of her kid is at least as hard as saving the world, and is valuable contribution to society. The point for me is that someone has to do the job that I'm doing, and it's not something that you could pay someone to do. I see...
8 comments
Read more

Things that are true

"Axial tilt is the reason for the season." (Picture a globe with the northern hemisphere tilted away from the sun...) I believe this is meant to be an anti-theist slogan, although I would point out that I believe there is a reason for the axial tilt. This is a runner up to my favorite true science picture, the "Gravity Forecast." I linked to this when I was a graduate student, but the site is long since down. Picture a weather forecast graphic, but instead of clouds and temperatures, the 5-day forecast predicts 9.8 m/s^2 down. Even the idea still makes me laugh, perhaps I will reproduce it someday. Luke cut his 4th tooth today (Finally!). So far they haven't caused us too much trouble. We'll see what happens when he gets his canines.
8 comments
Read more

Why the world is frustrating

It is very frustrating to be 2. Michael and I have been teaching Luke about closing doors and turning off lights---both good habits. He really enjoys opening the refrigerator door. He knows how to turn out the light. But when I try to get him to shut the refrigerator door, he screams, "Turn out the light!" He keeps getting in the way of the door so that he can push the little button. As far as I know, he's trying to turn off the light before we shut the door, and the fact that it keeps coming back on when we move him out of the way so we can shut the door drives him crazy. He doesn't believe us that the light goes out when the door is shut, and after all, how do we know ourselves? We've never seen it, we use logic. But this makes any attempt to shut the door a battle, unless I sneak over there without him seeing.
5 comments
Read more